REFLECTIONS ON MY INDIAN TANTRA EXPERIENCE
December 2007
I have just completed an unforgettable pilgrimage of Tantra temples in Tamil
Nadu, South India lead by Tantric Master Shri Param Eswaran, of the IFC
Mahavidya Temple. It has been a valuable gift to me, to experience traditional
Indian Tantra. Much of my perception of woman, the Goddess & Tantra have been
rearranged forever.
I’m known in Melbourne, Australia for my private practice in Spiritual Sexuality
Education, based on my training in Taoist & Tantric arts. I came to this field
from a background of traditional Tantric meditation, yoga, bodywork & women’s
mysteries. Personal experiences of the direct connection of sexuality and
spirituality guided me to explore what would eventually become a unique form of
healing. I’m the kind of western woman who has been involved with various
spiritual groups from a young age. Like many others, I’ve explored what’s
available in the West to find meaning and direct communion with the Divine. I’ve
studied everything from subtle healing therapies to the most confronting and
revealing Sacred Sexuality practices, New Age Tantra & everything in between!
Rather than condemning New Age Spirituality, I perceive it as a natural
byproduct of globalization. However, many Eastern teachers agree that the
Western psyche is in the stage of infancy, or adolescence at best. So the
tendency for us to reach only for the pleasurable sweets on the spiritual
smorgasbord is a common experience. The vegetables that may not taste so good at
first, are of course like the spiritual food that gives us substance and growth.
This is especially evident in New Age Tantra, where seekers want the pleasurable
delights of Shakti, well before the consciousness of Shiva has been developed.
This is what’s known as a significant danger on the Tantric path, and with good
reason. A kind of burnout from willful and misaligned Kundalini experiences,
unfulfillment and believing oneself to be an authentic practitioner while
supporting ego, are some of the dangers. Without emptying oneself of the mental
dross accumulated over generations, how can the most powerful energy a human
being has (Kundalini Shakti) be held with reverence or be used wisely?
Impatience to overcome our repressive conditioning can be the motivation to do
whatever it takes, but this usually works only to a point. Pretty soon we need
to find more substance from the traditional roots our new age spiritual systems
are based on. And I must say, the refreshing lack of dramatic emotional
catharsis in traditional Tantra has been a welcome change. (Overly-indulgent
emotional ‘healing’ is everywhere in the West). Dissolving past in the subtle
intensity of deep and constant practice, seems to me a much more refined way to
grow.
Mantra and meditation are the foundation practices in traditional Tantra. And
today, the de-programming to prepare for real spirituality that true teachers
like Shri Param are able to provide, is a necessity. Although I have maintained
a lifelong spiritual direction, I’ve seen how our conditioning as women runs in
deep and subtle ways. Even much of the New Age Goddess Spirituality concepts are
180 degrees away from true spiritual authenticity for women. For many years, I
have looked to the Goddess in all her forms for spiritual nourishment. However,
after this experience of Goddess Worship with Shri Param, I will no longer be
using the term ‘goddess’ so freely. He has helped widen my perspective of what
it takes for a woman to actually be worthy of being called a goddess, removing
my unnecessary romanticism. I will go home happy to continue my healing practice
with renewed clarity, while encouraging my innate soul wisdom to flourish.
To be honest, it took time for me to feel comfortable with Shri Param’s unique
teaching style. Sometimes I felt shocked by the part of me that had become
accustomed to the ‘love & light’ culture of communication in the New Age. His
traditional teaching style offers a realness that is rarely found, and we need
it! The insanity from the mental pollution I/we were born into, has become
increasingly obvious to me in ways I can no longer ignore. Shri Param is a very
loving and generous teacher, who is genuine in his capacity to facilitate real
spiritual growth. I feel I’ve found an authentic priestess training that can
support my growth as a woman and a teacher. It is a privilege to be welcomed
into his family home and to witness his daughter being raised with such love &
freedom, which has been very inspiring and educational for me.
It is no wonder this form of Tantra isn’t big business in the West! The road to
actual liberation (starving negative ego) can be far from entertaining or
exciting. It is with divine humor that I say, anyone who is over-enthusiastic
about self-realization is kidding themselves. The practice of having light shed
on ego can be the most excruciating, undesirable & horrendously painful
experience ever! (Although the level of discomfort directly relates to our level
of attachment).
So if you are a woman or a man, and you are attracted to the growing field of
spiritual/sexual healing – consider learning with a traditional teacher like
Shri Param Eswaran. With the unleashing of the ‘Sacred Prostitute’ archetype
into mainstream spirituality, there are many distortions to purify before being
able to grasp what it really means to be a ‘Temple Goddess’ or ‘Tantric
Priestess’. There are a number of sexuality trainings available, and having
experienced many of them, their fundamental purpose isn’t as clear as it could
be. Love. Love and consciousness need to be the central focus for any sexual
practice. It may seem strange to have female teachings revealed by a male
teacher, however the gift of the Divine Masculine is to simplify, make sure
Shakti is nurtured and not dissipating her energy.
As women, we already have everything we need and everything we are looking for.
Yoni IS the source of all creation. What we DO need is a clear environment for
our Shakti to flower, away from concepts that continue to interfere with real
growth. I intend to allow myself to flower with authentic love (which is often
not what it seems), feminine grace, healthy sexual purity and real inner beauty.
Shri Param’s support and guidance has offered me that clear space to learn how
to hold myself more fully as a woman of sovereignty. I look forward to returning
home to my life and to my practice with a deeper personal practice, which will
greatly enhance my capacity as a healing guide for others and the very real
potential of becoming a living goddess.
Devashi
'Healing Love Studio', Melb.
http://www.spiritualsexuality.com.au
Tantra Sri Chakra Temple and Tantra Teachers Training College building project
IFC Temple of Divine Love Australia | Europe | Indian
Tantric Goddess |
Women's Network |
Tantra Goddess Network |
IFC Mahavidya
